Tomorrows

I think I might be a failed blogger... or at least on the way to becoming one if I don't do something quick. It's funny how life just moves so fast. Fast enough that when I say I'll do it "tomorrow" enough, those "tomorrows" turn into weeks... maybe months... maybe longer.

You see... some things (like grading papers, taking down the bulletin boards, planning the fall festival, prepping the art project, doing the laundry, dusting the house, mopping the floors...) can be put off. Other things (like intentionally investing in the lives of family and friends, taking time to read the bible, spending time talking with God, writing a letter to someone needing encouragement, volunteering to help make a meal for someone in need...) cannot be put off.

So why is it, that the things that are of most importance are the things I let go of first? I hear myself offering all sorts of excuses like, "but I'm just so drained," and "I just don't have an ounce left to give," and "It's so much easier to just do nothing," and "I need a little extra sleep."

And the more I look at those excuses, the more certain I am that those aren't healthy "self-speak" conversations.

So I guess that requires change, and change is hard.

I was reading Psalm 63 today, and right under the title of the Psalm I had underlined this little part that said "A Psalm of David, When he was in the wilderness of Judah." Huh. I bet David was feeling a little drained... maybe like he had nothing left to give... maybe like it would be easier to just jump in his nothing box and exist. But this is what he wrote:

O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you;

my soul thirsts for you;

my flesh faints for you,

as in a dry and weary land where there is no water.

So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary,

beholding your power and glory.

Because your steadfast love is better than life,

my lips will praise you.

So I will bless you as long as I live;

in your name I will lift up my hands.

Psalm 63:1-4

It seems like David had it figured out. I'd like to depend on God like David did. So I guess that's where I'll start. Lord, may my heart and soul thirst for you, faint for you... because you are the only source that will satisfy. This world has nothing that will quench my thirst but you.

P.S. On a completely unrelated note, last Wednesday was picture day. I had NO idea that picture day was celebrated as a national holiday in first grade, did you? Those little first graders came in the cutest clothes, with their faces wiped and their hair slicked back, some had ties and suit coats, some had dresses and curled hair. (If the goal was to capture what they look like on a day-to-day basis, the goal was not accomplished. They looked nothing like they usually do.) And then we had gym... and art... and recess... and lunch... and pictures. Note for next year: pack a tide to go pen, some combs, and a spray bottle for picture day next year if I'd like to avoid tears and chaos. I guess this is the true journey of a first year teacher...