Apples & To-Do Lists

I have a million thoughts running through my head by the end of the day. A million. I think I mean that in the literal sense. If only I could follow through with some of these thoughts to completion... fill out the paperwork, document the behavior, create a word work station, get guided reading books, put wake-up work on desks for the morning, write the newsletter, create the calendar, prep the art project, submit the bus request, call the parent, figure out why he's late, understand why she's not talking, decide what intervention to try next, etc. etc. etc.

I am a list maker, and it is beyond frustrating that I can never get to the bottom of my list. Will this be possible eventually? I am starting to doubt.

It occurred to me today that at one point in my college career, I actually thought that part of being a teacher meant creating elaborate and aesthetically pleasing bulletin boards. Wishful thinking maybe. In fact... I think even going into this first year of teaching I thought that might happen. Funny... but the bulletin board in my classroom that reads, "Mrs. Wobbema's Pick of the Season" with a giant apple tree & individual apples with student names on them is starting to grow on me. I may never change it. Maybe I'll add leaves soon... then snow... then spring flowers. Or maybe it will just be a lonely green apple tree all year long.

The internal "plan" I had going into the school year was:

Day 1: Organize my classroom

Day 2: Decorate my classroom

Day 3: Plan math for the entire year

Day 4: Plan reading for the entire year

Day 5: Plan & create all art projects for the entire year

Day 6: Plan social studies & science for the entire year

Day 7-25: Enjoy the rest of summer vacation.

(Maybe it wasn't quite that dramatic... but still...)

Instead, I am still organizing, decorating, planning, planning, planning, and creating. Every time I turn around there are more things on my list.

But then I try to see the light in the midst of what feels heavy. (Note: I said try.)

And considering everything I think about these days seems to be linked to Apples (Back to School, Johnny Appleseed Day, bulletin boards, art projects, etc.) - these verses seemed especially applicable...

We pray that you'll live well for the Master, making him proud of you as you work hard in his orchard. As you learn more and more how God works, you will learn how to do your work. We pray that you'll have the strength to stick it out over the long haul - not the grim strength of gritting your teeth but the glory-strength God gives. It is strength that endures the unendurable. (Colossians 1:10-11)

I'm just guessing that the Lord's intent is not that I would be so consumed with teaching and school that it causes me to forget His purpose for my life. The minute I forget my purpose, the minute I start to rely on my own strength. Then, my life will just get messy. So instead, I am just going to start taking my own notes... How do you work, God? The more I know this, the more I will learn how to do my own work.